MoonDancing Demon Man
by NocturneAngel
Summary: In a window where the pale silver light is flooding in, stands a man, frozen in his tracks. Midnight hair grows wilder, and golden eyes becomes colder than ever. Prolouge. Saïx/OC and indicated MarVex in later chapters.
1. Chapter 1

_Bzzz_..

_Bzzz_..

Probing the little table by his bed, the blue haired and bed headed Nobody gritted his teeth as he felt a glass of water fall over, and spread its contains over the floor.

_Bzzz_..

_Bzzz_..

_Bzzz_..

He touched a pencil and a little note book (both soaked), if he remembered something in bed that needed to be recorded in reports the day after. The book he was currently reading - something about lunar eclipses Zexion had recommended.

_Bzzz_..

A chart of pain killers in case he woke up with a headache and had to work.

_Bzzz_..

The outlines of the alarm clock.

_Bzzz_..

_BzSLAM_!

When the sleepy fingers didn't find the right button, an entire fist landed on the appliance that was making the horrid noise, and it immediately sparked and went quiet.

His hand flew across his face, trailed along the X-shaped scar for a second, and then buried the fingers deep into the tangled hair.

Sigh.

The water was still dripping onto the floor, and Saïx _didn't want_ to get out of bed.

Work. Reports that needed to be finished. Preparations for this week's meeting. There were things he _had_ to do, but he _didn't want to_.

A growling escaped between his lips, as he rose onto his elbow and blinked in the dark room. The air tickled Saïx's bare skin as he sat up and searched for the switch to the bed lamp.

_Frrst_..!

And there went the light bulb. Saïx suppressed a strange and overwhelming need to break something, and rose from the bed to walk on and off in the room a few turns, quietly shaking the need off.

When he finally had gotten the clothes on, the blue haired nobody tried to draw a hand through his hair before leaving for breakfast. Another growl slipped him, as the fingers got stuck in the mass of hair. Judging from the bed, he had been tossing himself on and off in his sleep, and the tangled strands were another proof of that.

It took about half an hour to sort out the mess that was supposed to be his hair, and when Saïx was getting down to breakfast, he found that he was so late, he didn't have the time to take anything else but a glass of juice before having to leave for work.

The day was the worst ever. Saïx was fully aware that he was unable of being annoyed, yet that was the only word he could find for it. When walking to lunch, he bumped into Demyx, who was running the opposite way, looking like he'd forgotten something in his room.

"Oh, sorry!" the tinier nobody swirled around on the spot. "You having a bad day, puppy? You look like.."

He interrupted himself and stumbled a few steps backwards as Saïx literally roared at him, and after a moment of shocked staring, number nine hurried off.

So he felt bad at lunch - really bad, since Demyx kept throwing glances his way, like he was afraid Saïx would get another outburst, his eyes all glossy when he noticed the blue haired one looked back.

And the day just kept on getting worse.

Xemnas didn't give him the usual twelve reports to look over, and then give back, but Saïx got twenty of them, since several Organization members had had double missions this week.

Xigbar seemed to have seen it fit to pull a prank on him, pouring syrup all over the toilet and basin that lay closest to Saïx's office, which he naturally used when working.

Xaldin had chosen this day to serve salad for dinner, so Saïx ended up hungry for the entire evening after not being there in time for breakfast, and hardly eating any lunch, as Demyx's sad looks made him lose his appetite.

Vexen had him run three turns between the cellar and the attic, looking for different stored chemicals for him, and got an outburst when Saïx tried to use a portal, yelling in a voice that cracked into a shriek that those things couldn't be put through something like that, unless Saïx wanted them to explode.

Zexion had for some reason started to re-organize the library, and wanted Saïx to put books on the top shelves for him, and he was stuck with that for two hours until Lexaeus showed up.

Axel.. Well, he ruined Saïx's day by just being Axel.

Demyx wouldn't speak to him, Luxord nagged on him for a game of poker, Marluxia was mad because someone had stepped on his flowers, and blamed Saïx - that was innocent, Larxene wanted him to carry things for her as she moved around the furniture in her room and even Roxas was angry at him for snatching at Axel, and did everything he could to be in the way.

In the end, Lexaeus, Mistix, Xeline and Silexio were the only ones that _didn't_ make Saïx's life a hell that day. Lexaeus didn't bother him at all, and neither did Mistix. Xeline showed a strangely shining smile when she walked by in the corridor, and sent a warm shiver down Saïx's spine - one that he just couldn't explain. And Silexio treated him with muffins she'd baked with Xeline. Sure, they looked like misshaped, brown jellyfish turned inside out, but the taste was good.

Despite these little signs of affection, Saïx was in a horrible mood as he got into his room again, late that evening. The reports were almost finished, he had one left, but decided to finish that during breakfast the next day. So taking off his cloak and shirt, Saïx stepped over to the window and reached out for the curtains.

With a jerk of his wrists, they flew apart, and the second after, the window was open. Cold, fresh air trailed across his bare upper body, and for a single moment, Saïx let himself close his eyes and enjoy the night outside.

And then, he suddenly felt like he was stabbed in the chest. Something crushed his lunges to the size of a coin, and he was gasping for breath but gaining none. The windowsill creaked in protest as his fingers curled around it, and claws dug into the white stone where nails had just been.

He felt the hair slip down his back as it grew longer and wilder, and his eyes was flushed with mist that made it hard to see. His muscles trembled as they tensed unintentionally, and before he lost control completely, Saïx turned his face up, and the golden eyes met a perfect full moon.


	2. Chapter 2

Xeline twisted in her bed as distant growls and yells found their way to her ears, sensitive even when sleeping. She was able to hear everything that went on in the castle - that was one of the abilities that came with her element - and it had been a hard time until she learned to sort away everything without importance.

Now, her beautifully drawn brow knit, and after a moment, she realised it wasn't in her dreams that stone was torn apart, but in the real world. As real as it could be in The Castle That Never Was.

Grey eyes, the colour of storm clouds, flew open, and she stared into the air for a moment, localizing the sounds.

There was Xaldin's voice, shrill from controlled fear and angrier then she'd ever herd him. He was commanding others in a way unlike him.

There was a roar from a voice that resembled Saïx's, but it was rougher and deeper than usual. He sounded bewildered. Furious.

The sound of Demyx's footsteps as he danced a few meters backwards, and she could faintly discern the _swoosh_ that a paw, wielded through the air, created.

At this point, Xeline got out of her bed, and far away in the eastern end of the castle, she could hear Marluxia do the same thing.

Seconds after, she'd thrown on a bra and a pair of trousers, and was running out the door, still zipping her cloak.

"Look out!" It was Xigbar's voice and it trembled in a way that made him sound downright petrified. Yet, she could hear him run a few steps, and then there was a tearing sound along with a thud. Demyx screamed, but then had to back off again.

Xeline picked up her pace now, running so fast, her foot length hair whipped behind her, and in another part of the castle, Vexen was summoning his shield, and there was a _clink_ as he picked up something made of glass, and apparently put it into his pocket. Then, his heels drummed against the stone stairs.

Now, the part of the castle she was getting to looked more and more like a battlefield. Windows were shattered, walls broken. There were places you couldn't recognize from how they looked a few hours ago.

"Xeline!" Zexion said her name in a rapid way. "Saïx is in this wing - he's gone mad. More mad than usually. Xigbar, Xaldin and Demyx are searching the place now. I'm supposed to collect the others here." He sniffed the air the same moment Xeline could hear Marluxia's steps come closer. "Number XI is almost here, and we sent Vexen to prepare something to calm Saïx down."

Xeline nodded. All this was said in a stressed speed, yet not a single word was missed.

"I think he's done. I herd him coming up the stairs."

Now, Marluxia joined them, scythe already summoned in his hand, and he got the same update as Xeline.

"Why Demyx?" the pink haired man asked, and Xeline was wondering the same thing. Xaldin and Xigbar were amazingly good fighters, and also a strong team. But Demyx's good abilities lay more in his way with people, and.. Ah, she'd figured it out; the same second Zexion explained it.

"He can calm Saïx down. He does that quite often."

"Mh", Marluxia just nodded as the sound of two approaching men reached even him. One of them stumbled under the weight of the other, who was dragging his feet on the floor.

"Xigbar", Xeline mumbled, listening to their breathing, and Zexion threw a quick glance at her, "and Demyx." The Cloaked Schemer smelled the air.

"One of them are wounded", he added, a frown on his face, "perhaps both."

"Where is Xemnas?" Marluxia hissed, as the steps came closer. "He should be here, handling the situation."

"He's on his way", Mistix was panting slightly, and even Xeline jumped as she spoke behind them. This was the only person's footsteps she couldn't hear. "He's just checked the other corridors. Luxord, Roxas and Lexaeus are shutting off the corridor leading to the kitchen, and Axel and Larxene are by the stairs to the attic." Then, the blue haired nobody drew a sharp breath. "Dem!"

The both nobodies that'd been approaching had now rounded the corner leading them into a corridor where the group could see them.

Demyx were hanging unconscious over Xigbar's shoulder, and his head rolled on and off for each step. Xigbar, in turn, was paler than a ghost, and his right arm hung bleeding and useless by his side.

"Xemnas!" he called, and behind them, the Superior was approaching. "This is out of control! We can't hold this away!" By "this", he meant Saïx, and Xeline felt a strange jerk inside of her, like her intestines were twisting in an odd way.

"We have to", the voice was not to be contradicted.

"He's gone mad!" Xigbar's voice was now getting shriller and shriller. "I can't _feel_ my right arm! And he even turned on Demyx! If we're to keep him away from the rest of the castle, we can't guarantee Saïx's.."

"Enough", Xemnas interrupted, and in the short pause that followed, Xeline noticed the sound of running feet, followed by a thunder of paws. "Saïx's safety is to be guaranteed, do I have to remind you of my orders? This isn't something he can control, and therefore.." Xeline hissed for them to be quiet ".. he can't be supposed to.." another hiss "..accept any damage from.."

"_Shh_!" Now, the both men noticed her, and her tense face actually made them turn quiet. The six nobodies listened intensely, but Xeline guessed she was the only one that could hear Xaldin approach in a furious speed.

"Xeline, what are you..?" it was Maruxia's dark voice that broke what for every one else was silence.

"Xaldin's on his way", Zexion raised his head, apparently smelling the air again and nodded in agreement. "I don't think he's hurt, but something's following.."

Xeline interrupted herself as she realised the meaning of her own words, and they all sunk into a position ready for fight, by sheer reflex.

The Whirlwind Lancer took a turn on a foot and a knee, and then spurted the last meters into the crowd in the corridor.

"He's about half a minute behind me." Despite the running, he was hardly panting at all.

They all fell silent. A tense, almost electric silence, that for Xeline was disturbed by the sound of Saïx's running feet, how he smelled the air, and slowed down, slowly coming closer.

Half a minute passed. A minute. She could hear his breaths now, the scratching of his claws against the stone floor. And then he came into sight.

The blue hair was wilder and longer than before, and the golden eyes held a terrible glow. Along Saïx's right arm, there were long strains of blood, and the hand was covered in it. He was on all fours, but slowly rose to his feet, the back shooting up, and arms hanging down, slightly curved like he was holding something between his animalistic hands. The chest was heaving, and fangs had sprouted from his mouth, so it formed a horrible grin.

Behind her, Xeline could hear the sound of Xigbar swaying and tottering a little, and then Xemnas' voice followed, giving an order without taking his eyes from Saïx.

"Number II, leave. Take Number IX out of here and treat your arm. You'll be more in the way than of use in that state."

The little _smack_ that was herd revealed that Xigbar opened his mouth and was about to contradict, but he changed his mind. This wasn't the time to argue.

"Yes, Superior."

They took off through a portal, and whatever it was about it - the movement, the sight, the sound - it made Saïx start to slowly approach them.

There were places on his thighs and knees where the trousers had ripped; and when the moon-dancing demon man came closer, Xeline could see how muscles twitched and tensed in his naked upper body.

Somewhere in the other end of the wing, she herd the quick stepping as someone turned around and started to run in their direction. Vexen, she confirmed, after listening another tense moment, and discerning the clinking of whatever glass objects lay in his pocket.

As Saïx crept closer, she herd the sound of Xaldin's hands gripping harder around the shaft of the lance, how Zexion drew a deep breath in order to gain concentration and how Marluxia's cloak rustled as he raised the scythe. She couldn't hear anything but Mistix's breaths, which were louder than normal, and Xeline herself summoned the two meter silver chain which held a slim and pointy one-foot blade in the end, and a ring that fit perfectly on her finger in the other.

They all made ready for combat, even Saïx who panted harder, whose muscles tensed more, and from whose mouth it ran a thin stream of clear saliva.

He huddled, making ready to leap, and they crouched, ready to meet the attack.

And then, a door opened, almost right between them.

The blue-haired beast hesitated, and his eyes flicked from the group of nobodies to the open door as the sound of shuffling footsteps reached his ears.

"..noisy", a small, sleepy voice announced, as a grey-haired little girl showed up in the doorway. She held the corner of a blanket in one hand, and rubbed her eye with the other, which was balled to a little fist.

The tiny nobody smacked her mouth a couple of times, like it was dry after sleeping with her mouth open, and then, large eyes blinked at them.

"Xellie?" That was her nickname for Xeline, and her tired eyes wandered from one nobody to the other, while a low snarling was leaking from between Saïx's lips. "Maru-chan?" She had misheard Vexen saying Marluxia - and as the scholar pronounced it _Marusha_, it wasn't very strange that Silexio had made it Maru-chan. "Xally? 'Isti.." She interrupted herself as a dark shadow was growing from behind.

It felt like.. like all her blood had turned freezing cold as the little girl turned around, facing a furious and highly deadly berserker, hardly three feet from her face.

Silexio blinked a couple of times, and then she asked a very simple, very childish question.

"Puppy mad?"

His chest was heaving faster and faster, as he practically gasped for air, feeding the growl that was created deep down in his throat. For a moment, Saïx looked like he didn't know what to do, but then the animalistic side of him took over.

A clawed hand was raised, ready to strike the little girl as Xeline let go of the chain, letting it disperse, and then taking the few meters to Silexio in a quick leap.

In that very moment, the second she was running forwards in a speed she didn't think herself capable of, Silexio's eyes - no, her entire face - seemed to change. For the time a heartbeat takes, the pupils narrowed, and the asking features turned hard and cold, and then it was gone.

The girl didn't make a sound, didn't even take her eyes of Saïx, as Xeline picked her up and stumbled a few steps backwards, dodging the wielded paw precisely, but feeling the draught it created and the metallic smell of Xigbar's blood.

She hadn't been thinking, and now, she stood - lonely, it seemed - in front of a beast that had maimed one of his companions and attacked one of the persons closest to him. If a nobody could ever feel fear, this was what Xeline felt right now.

She was unable to move, though every muscle in her body was tensed and trembling. Her mouth was slightly open, and her eyes glossy for a reason she could not determine herself. Saïx came closer, so slowly it took an eternity, and his golden eyes seemed to glow just like the moon that showed through a window on the opposite wall. And in all this, a little hand tugged Xeline's hair, and Silexio's childish voice was herd again.

"Xellie, puppy mad.."

"Yes, Silexio.." The answer was no more than a faint, trembling whisper. "Puppy is mad.."

But.. he seemed to hesitate. For a single moment, Xeline thought - but she wasn't sure - she saw a trace of struggle in Saïx's eyes. The tendons of his throat was tensed hard, and as one muscle seemed to work for attack, another looked like it was trying to keep him back.


	3. Chapter 3

It was a reflex. When the sound of shattered glass suddenly exploded in the silence, Xeline turned her face away, and pushed Silexio's head to her chest.

Through the darkness of her closed eyes, Saïx roared, and shards of crystal fell to the ground.

Then, he roared again. And again.

The clinking had stopped when Xeline opened her eyes again, but Saïx still growled in a violent protest.

Vines and thick roots had broken the huge windows that faced the wall where Silexio's door was. With an incredible speed, they had invaded the corridor and made the meter where Saïx stood a green jungle, full of rope-like plants that held him in place.

The berserker didn't like this. He didn't like it at all. The walls and frames where the vines were attached creaked as he pulled them with all his might, and a soft, pained moan had Xeline turn around, Silexio still in her arms.

There stood Marluxia, his face twisted to a strained grimace, and his arm reached out, the fingers bent like claws. The scythe had vanished, and a meter or so beside him, Vexen was approaching the captured Saïx in a careful way.

"Hurry up, cupcake", the Graceful Assassin said in a humouring, yet harsh way, "he's _strong_.I can't hold him like this forever."

Vexen made a sound that sounded something like "_hmph_", as Marluxia addressed him as "cupcake", but he didn't make a fuss about it.

Standing a meter or so from Saïx, he pulled an incredibly small test tube from his pocket, along with a slim syringe, which he rapidly filled with a carefully measured amount of the clear fluid inside the tube.

Trying at first to give him the injection in the throat, Vexen found that Saïx made a strange movement with his head, trying to bite him, and he ended up giving the shot in the side, where the grasping claws couldn't reach him.

Then, it only took a matter of seconds, perhaps half a minute, before Saïx struggled less intensely. He was breathing heavier, and in a sudden, the muscles relaxed, and he sunk to the floor. Moments after, he was knocked out cold, and after a little nod from Xemnas, Marluxia dropped to all fours, panting desperately and shaking visibly.

"Good work, number XI."

Between two gasps, Marluxia was able to answer. "Thank you, Superior."

There was a strange second of silence. The thought of putting Silexio down hadn't struck Xeline, so she was still carrying the little girl, who broke the odd atmosphere by asking:

"Puppy sleepy?"

"Yes, number XV", Vexen answered in Xeline's stead, "in a way."

"Oh.." Behind them, Xaldin had approached Xemnas, and the two of them were discussing what to do with Saïx, and the conversation grew louder and louder, and Silexio was on her way to hushing them down when Xeline put her hand over the girl's mouth.

"Puppy is sleeping very deeply", she said softly, "he won't wake up from that."

Silexio shaped her little cherry lips to an "O", and then nodded, letting the two nobodies continue.

"I can guess what Xigbar will say", Xaldin said in a rather soft way. "We all knew what happened last time it was this bad. But we didn't knock him out that time. We don't know if he'll still be crazed when he waked up."

"That is true", Xemnas answered in a rather defensive voice, "but I promised Saïx this place, partly as a refuge, a place where he would not be chased or hurt or locked up for what happens to him every full moon."

"But Xemnas", there was something serious about it, when Xaldin used the Superior's name in such a way, "we have to put the safety of", he made a gesture, "fourteen of the Organization's members before one", with a fling of his arm, he indicated Saïx.

"Indeed", Xemnas agreed, "but where to put him?"

At this moment, Vexen rose a hand in order to gain attention.

"A dungeon, perhaps. Sir?" he proposed. "After all, they're made for locking people up, so he won't get loose all of a sudden."

It was like something was gnawing on Xeline's spine, and while moving her weight over to the other foot, and adjusting her grip around the nobody of a five-years-old, she tried to figure out what it was, not paying very much attention to the conversation that took place some ten feet from her.

"Good", Xemnas had raised his voice slightly, and was now speaking to all of them. "Number XIII", Mistix's flung her head up, "go get number V", she hurried off. Quickly and soundlessly. "Number XI, release him, and number III get ready to take him to the dungeons. Number IV, go make sure there is one ready."

"Yes, Superior", Vexen answered, and nodded his head in something that looked like a half-bow. Then, he vanished towards the basement, and Marluxia started to draw the vines and roots back in order to release the unconscious Saïx.

They kept on talking, sending Zexion off to make sure Vexen chose a dungeon with chains attached to the wall, and then arranging it so Lexaeus and Xaldin could carry Saïx there as soon as the Silent Hero showed up.

Xeline was weighing from foot to foot as she watched Xaldin and Lexaeus strap Saïx to the wall, handcuffing him tightly so he hung unconscious by the wrists.

She had finally put Silexio down, and the little girl was now holding a tress of Xeline's ankle length hair tightly. The two female nobobies were the only ones but the Superior, Xaldin and Lexaeus that were still in the room, and Xeline twisted uncomfortably as the Whirlwind Lancer finally rose.

"Done", he said shortly, and brushed some dirt off his hands.

She couldn't really call it a feeling. For she was a nobody, she wasn't able to feel. Right?

"Good", Xemnas's voice was slightly strained, like he didn't want to do what he was doing. "Isolate him until tomorrow."

But still, maybe she didn't feel it, but she _thought_ it was wrong. To lock him up like that. To force him to, when he woke up, face the terrible things he'd done all alone.

"Yes, Superior", Xaldin answered, and Lexaeus let out an agreeing little "Hm".

She couldn't stand it. He was probably going to laugh at her, but..

"Seal him away."

"Wait!" In the corner of her eye, Xeline could see Silexio turn a pair of sparkling eyes at her, and the elder nobody put a calming hand on the little girl's head. "Superior, please wait."

"What now, number XIV?" The voice was.. tried, weary in a strange way that she didn't understand.

"Isn't it a little.. well, cold-hearted to lock him away like this?" Xemnas raised an eyebrow at these words. "I mean, you said yourself he couldn't help it, and.. and we don't know how he'll react tomorrow, when he finds out what happened."

He agreed, she could see it already, and Xeline knew the argument she'd expected wouldn't even take place, for she'd won it.

"It is necessary to keep number VII locked up until we know if he has control of himself when he wakes." He hesitated. It was hardly to be seen, and probably Xeline - the one that stood right in front of him - was the only one that noticed. "But what do you suggest?"

"I.." Xeline didn't really know what she wanted. It just seemed to _wrong_ to do what they were doing, but she couldn't come up with some other solution.

Xemnas cleared his throat, he didn't like people that didn't speak when they'd asked permission to, and been granted.

"Let me stay with him." It was a desperate saving said with proud grace and control, and from the look of his eyes, Xeline could see that her Superior was impressed by her way of suggesting that she would be locked up alone together with a man that might tear her to pieces the moment he woke up. Or, he would've been impressed if he'd been able to.

But the battle was already won, and Xemnas would agree. It he had a soft spot for Saïx, or just realized this was the most humane thing to do was unclear, but he nodded shortly, and gestured to Lexaeus to open the door again.

When Xeline moved through the slim opening between the door and the doorframe, she felt a little jerk in her hair, and a childish voice was raised.

"Sillie too!" A smile touched the female nodoby's lips as the little girl spoke the self-proclaimed nickname that was pronounced as "Silly".

"No, sweetie", she answered, with a voice that would be soft even for a woman capable of feelings. "You need to go back to sleep." She was quiet for a moment and noticed the pout that started to form on Silexio's lips. "But you know what? Why don't you and Xally bake some cookies for Saïx to have when he comes out again? I'm sure he'll be happy."

"Sillie and Xally make cookies for puppy?" She pointed at herself, at Xaldin and at Saïx, as she spoke the names.

"Yes", Xeline nodded. "He will surely be feeling bad when he wakes up tomorrow, so he'll want cookies."

This was the simple logic of Silexio. Someone wasn't all right, so give them cookies. Surely, Saïx could not feel, but the eight year old girl just knew that in theory, and could not translate it to the reality.

"Sillie go make cookies!" The grey-haired nobody threw a fist in the air in a pose that was surely meant to look like a super hero's, but she didn't succeed very well. She looked more like a kindergarten football team player before a match.

Xeline laughed quietly as the little girl ran off, tugging Xaldin along as she went. Then, a cold - no, almost cold, but not entirely - gaze was locked upon her, and Xemnas nodded a little, hasting her to go into the cell.


	4. Chapter 4

The door was locked with a heavy thud, followed by a klink and then another as it was locked

The door was locked with a heavy _thud_, followed by a _klink_ and then another as it was locked.

It was strange how a locked door between Xeline and her fellow members of the Organization could make so much difference, how it could make the room seem so lonely and her.. well, not really _feel_, right? But it suddenly was like she was shut out in a sense.

Xeline couldn't put her finger to it, and she didn't try to either, as about to sit down next to Saïx, but changed her mind. A tiny voice inside her was repeating Xaldin's words inside her head, in a way she certainly didn't like. _We don't know if he'll still be crazed in the morning_.

Instead she sat down uncomfortably at the other wall, right opposite to him, and waited. Waited for the morning to come, and wondering whether Saïx would still be in his berserker-like state, or not.

_Thud_.. _Thud.. Thud.._

The world was dark. Heavy. Nothing was to be seen or felt.

_Thud.. Thud.._

The air was pressing down upon him, causing a dull pain.

_Thud.._

Cold stones beneath him.

_Thud.._

A metallic smell tickling his nostrils.

_Thud.._

The soft sound of a woman breathing.

_Thud.._

His vocal cords vibrated as a soft groan slid between his lips. Then he moved his head, and a flash of white light crashed down before his eyes.

Adrenaline exploded within him. A roar emerged from his chest. Chains clattered as he pulled them furiously. The air was damp and there was no light but a little candle on the floor next to the wall opposite to him.

Handcuffs. Chains. Doors and stone walls. They had locked him in. Caged him.

The iron bars in the door shook as he jerked the bonds that held him, threw himself in different directions in a carnal attempt to get loose.

The rough floor scratched his knees, the cuffs chafed the skin of his wrists, and the smell of blood seemed to trigger something even worse inside of him.

Eyes were wide open, but the world was nowhere to be seen. He could feel his own lips grow cold as they were parted, but the growling was not to be herd. Strained muscles hurt and his heard was about to explode when a voice that had been there all the time suddenly got through to him.

"..on't do this! Please, Saïx, stop!"

It was a lovely voice. Vibrate and full, yet not dark as one could imagine. A voice that shot straight into one's soul.

He roared in pain and protest as all instincts told him to tear free, but his conscious mind tried to stop.

The woman gasped, and then her voice changed. It was soft, calming, yet encouraging.

"That's it.." she was breathing through her mouth, and something about her scent was familiar. "That's it, easy.."

Though the muscles were still tensed, he let the chains slacker, his chest heaving violently.

"..Xeline." His own voice was rough, dull, but she moved before his closed eyes.

"Yes, it's me. Calm down, Saïx, and I'll let you loose."

The promise of getting rid of the bonds had him force the breaths grow slower, to let his hand down, and then a cool hand touched his arm.

"That's it", she said again, even softer.

He could see her, faintly, in the flickering light of the candle that Xeline no doubt had brought inside the cell with her. In the dim light, the breathtaking beauty was turned into a goddess, strong and frail in the same time.

Her gracefully drawn brow was knit into an expression of the deepest worry, and the cherry lips were parted just the slightest.

Stormy grey eyes were fixed upon him for a moment, and then she smiled a tiny bit, letting the smooth hand slide down to Saïx's wrist as she undid the handcuffs.

"There you go.." she said it in a calm voice, soft and soothing and not at all the kind of overly positive voice that are often used by a sickbed.

He could feel her gaze upon him, watching like wondering if he would wreak havoc again; yet in the same time, Xeline's look was compassionate.

Something stung inside of him. At first, Saïx believed it was because she looked so scared for him. Because she _couldn't_ feel sad for him. Because she imagined she could feel at all, when she couldn't.

But then he realized. She wasn't scared _of_ him. She was scared _for_ him. There was something about it that made Saïx.. He couldn't define it. It was like when you put a cool compress upon a burn wound, or drink when you're thirsty.

Whatever "it" was, it made Saïx smile and raise his head towards her.

"Xeline.." he spoke her name again, with a tune that was softer, more personal than he ever used, though his voice was strained and broken.

A hand found Saïx's cheek, and black hair swept across the floor when she moved closer to him.

There was a moment of silence, when Saïx didn't know what to say and Xeline seemed to hesitate whether to speak her mind or not.

"How are you feeling?" she finally asked, in a voice that was.. reserved, in a sense. As if she herself thought the question was stupid.

Saïx wondered himself. Closing his eyes, he tried to locate _something_, though not a feeling, but he tried to examine his own state.

It was impossible. To compare it with something, it was like someone had filled his head with syrup, so everything was dim and slow and sticky.

"Dull", he finally answered, and a swift smile touched Xeline's lips once again. Then, Saïx frowned. He remembered the sight of the full moon, and the tickling of his own hair as it grew longer. Also, he remembered the intense pain in the very tips of his fingers when his nails grew thicker and turned into claws. But then.. he didn't remember a thing.

"What happened?"

There was a change of atmosphere, and Xeline shifted uncomfortably.

"What's the last thing you remember?" Saïx told her what'd just flown through his head. "I don't know everything", she started, slowly, with her eyes fixed on the floor between them. "I woke up a while after it started.."

As Xeline told him, the memories came crushing down upon Saïx. They struck him with the force of a hammer in a blacksmith's hand, and before he knew what happened, Saïx found that cold tears were running down his cheeks, that his upper lip was withdrawn in a silent growl of pain.

It didn't matter how well Saïx knew that he was incapable of feeling. This very moment, he was afraid of himself, of what happened to him so that he hurt the ones close to him.

Normally, he had some sort of control over it, when he was battle-crazed or such likes. But at times like this, he was scared and ashamed over whatever dwelled inside him. A beast that was triggered by the pale silver light that he loved so much. That was amused, even pleasured by feeling flesh rip beneath its claws, and that purred inside his chest at the taste of blood.

Saïx was disgusted with himself. Filled with hatred and fear towards the creature that he became, the one that joyfully would have ripped the head off even Demyx, one of the most innocent of the Organization, and definitely one of the closest to him.

The world seemed cold. Colder than the dungeon where the lonely candle's flickering light enhanced and deepened the shadows of the blood still upon his hands.

They dripped from his chin, wet his face till he couldn't see anymore, but no matter how many tears he cried in his lonely darkness, they would never wash away the blood and shame that filled him, so strong it almost made him nauseous.

Then there was something warm around his shoulders, and a soothing voice whispered soft words that he couldn't hear, but the mere thing of a friendly voice in the depths of his self-loathing was enough to make Saïx whimper from the strange pain that he felt.

Silken hair fell over his legs like a warming quilt, and then arms that radiated with softness and comfort were put around him, pulled him close and the voice kept mumbling quiet little words.

And there, Saïx cried in all his misery, loathed himself for what he had done, and what lay still in the future, hid from the world in the warmth and stillness of Xeline's embrace.


End file.
